Ah, the world of online dating... Online dating is the most significant way that the world of romance has changed in the 21st century- from hook-ups to proposals, you can find everything at the touch of a button and prolonged, slightly awkward online chats; where you try to determine if this person is going to feed you to their cats or not.
So what do you need to know about online dating before you dive into websites, first dates, and profile pictures that were not edited or taken from three years ago when you were a little bit hotter?
Image Source: Bigstock Photo/Vadym Pastukh
Chemistry is that tiny little spark that changes a friendship into something more. It’s that frisson of romance between two people that keep a relationship afloat. And you know what? You can’t judge it online. You can get on well with someone, have all these interests in common, and still find that when you come face to face after the online journey, you don’t click on a romantic level.
It’s worth bearing that in mind when you’re chatting with someone new online, there is a risk that you may try to convince yourself there’s something there when there very well might not be. You don't realize the lack of chemistry until you meet. If you sense the spark isn't there...pause... ask yourself if you would pursue this as a romantic relationship under any other circumstances. If the answer’s no? Don’t panic, and move on.
The truth of the matter is that online dating is particularly attractive to people who don’t have the time or inclination to go out and meet people offline. That’s not a bad thing- in fact, it’s a great way for busy professionals or parents to connect with new people, or just to make acquaintances with people who you never would have encountered in real life. Still...remember that this does mean that not everyone who chats with you has the time or even the inclination to meet in the outside world. They actually might only be looking to converse or they may be saving their dates for someone they feel like they really click with. Don’t take it personally. On the flip side, this knowledge means that you too can be a little bit picky with who you hit the town with as well. Don’t feel compelled to head out on dates out of politeness. Streamline your schedule so only those with real potential make the cut.
Image Source: Bigstock Photo/Kraken Images
Now, there’s a persistent misconception that online dating is about straight-up hook-ups and therefore, it only really revolves around what your pictures look like and how quickly you respond to “hey u up” messages.
Avoid the basic hook-up sites, and really put some effort into putting that profile together. So, so many generic profiles exist on dating sites- “good sense of humor”, “want to get to know the area”, “open-minded”- that putting some effort into yours will really make it stand out. Go light on the pictures- no more than five or six- and focus your efforts on a smart and unique profile that will stand out. Most importantly? Don’t lie. It’s a pointless pastime that will end with you having to break your mistruths to a potential new partner, or just sheepishly slinking that information off the site when you get called out.
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